That Bucket List

It’s noon, Call Me Maybe playing non-stop in the background and I’m already hungry so I decided to create my bucket list (konek!). I remember during my college days, I started listing but I think it got lost, along with some people. Awww, bitter! Hahaha.

Ok, so this post will be updated whenever I feel like it or a bright idea strikes me.

For now, here it is.

 

1. Create my own music video and upload it in YouTube. Enubeyen, walang challenge. I think a lot of people, and I mean a loooooooot, have done this already. Basta, siguro kanta ni Pink tutal peyborit ko siya.

2. I’ll get myself inked. Dun sa paa, “I am owned by God.” in Sanskrit. Para pag naligaw ako sa hell, ibabalik nya ako sa may-ari.

3. Ride an elephant. Sa Bangkok, para social.

4. Learn how to swim. Oo na, oo na! Hindi na ako marunong.

5. I want to have a pilgrimage to the Holy Land.

6. Learn Japanese language. Yung todo, spoken and written. I always have this fascination with their language. Exxag lang talaga sa hirap!

7. Skinny dipping. Naks! Kakayanin ko to!

8. Lay on the roof at night and watch the stars. Kung may kasama, mas bongga.

9. Jump off a cliff. Hahaha. Feeling ko ‘tong bucket list na ito ang talagang ikakamatay ko.

10. Watch ‘Rent’ the musical live.

11. Visit the Taj Mahal.

12. Watch a meteor shower.

13. I want to ride a hot air balloon. Kelangang pag-ipunan kase mahal pero achievable naman sa Clark.

14. Paint my room. Madaming madaming kulay. Parang rainbow.

15. Kiss in the rain. Assuming, meron akong ka-kiss.

16. Be part of a flash mob! Bet ko talaga ‘yung nagda-dance na madaming tao. Parang ansaya saya nila.

17. Go on a cruise. Kahit Asian lang kung di talaga keri ng baul.

18. I want to get married. Oha!

19. Go to a casino. Spend lots of money. I never gambled in my entire life so goodluck.

20. Get drunk at Oktoberfest! I mean the real one in Munich, Germany.

21. Paint! Wahahahaha. Anu kayang kalalabasan? I wonder.

22. Finish a marathon. Ooooooh, this is gonna be really, really hard. Buwis buhay!

23. Play laser tag. Meron sa Cubao, I think.

24. Learn how to cook. Kahit isang putahe lang, basta bongga dapat. Goodluck sa mga kakain. I-ready ang mga health card!

25. I want to sport a new hairstyle. Ever since nagkaisip ako, naka-ponytail lang ako palagi. So para maiba naman.

26. I want to learn how to play the violin. Marunong akong mag-gitara ng slight. Pero violin ang bet ko para social.

27. Skydive! Oh no, this list is getting serious.

28. Walk on the Great Wall of China. Gusto ko kasing makita sa moon.

29. Make a scrapbook of my life. Mala-Facebook timeline ang peg.

30. Swim with the dolphins. Pero saka na pag natuto nakong mag-swimming.

One Day, Someday

Where were you when I was born? Where were you when I unknowingly uttered my first word or when I courageously took my first step? Where were you for the last 26 birthdays I had? Where were you when I needed someone to accompany me to the principal’s office or perhaps come up on the stage with me while receiving an award? I’ve had several, you know. Where were you when I wanted to learn how to drive? Where were you when Mum’s so mad at me and I had no one to talk to? Where were you when life hit me real hard and I just needed someone tougher to lean on and tell me that everything’s gonna be fine? The list could go on but I guess the only thing I really wanted to ask is where were you my entire life?

I guess up to now, you have no idea how excited I was to tell you everytime I topped my class or whenever I aced a Math exam. Mum would always say I am good at it because you are. She said I got that from you. I even wished, for a time, to be an engineer like you, probably in a different field but still I wanted to be the same as you. I’ve always looked up to you. I felt that even though you are not with us, you are still the best father anyone could ever have.

Needless to say, it was all ok then. I totally understood why you had to work far away from home. You need to be away from us just to provide everything that we need. I kept praying that someday you won’t have to be away, that one day our family will be united again. Until something happened, something that wasn’t part of the plan. It was until you realized it wasn’t us who you want to be with.

I don’t want to sound like an ungrateful child because I’m not. I was, am and will be forever thankful for providing all our needs. I admit I could never repay you for everything you’ve done for us no matter what I do. But still, that doesn’t change a single thing. I still don’t understand why this had to happen.

I may have already forgiven you for letting me down and for destroying my own image of a family. To be honest, I really don’t give a sh*t anymore. But I’m not sure if I could forgive you for hurting that one person who assumed all your responsibilities without any complaints, that one person who loved you despite your shortcomings, that one person who tried to understand you in any way she could, that one person who masks her feelings just so we won’t see she’s hurt, that one person who made sure our love and respect for you never ceased, that one person who still hopes that one day, you’d be coming back.

I don’t intend to bring this ill feeling to my grave. I hope that someday, I’d find it in my heart to forgive you for what you’ve done. I’m sure you have your own reasons for it. I may not understand at all but it shouldn’t matter anymore. Perhaps, one day, someday.

Giving 103% at Work

—> totally reposting

We, all, have been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%. Here’s to achieving 103%. A little math that might prove helpful in the future!

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

equals:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

then:
H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98 % Only

K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96 % Only

But:
A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100 %

However:
B U L L S H I T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%

10 Oct 2011

Today, I:

had to stand for 30 minutes in a moving bus;

am quite busy which is very unusual for a Thursday;

haven’t taken my lunch yet and it’s 3:00 PM already;

am struggling writing a blog entry which has a title: “Basura at Aswang”;

will be having dinner tonight at Army Navy;

am missing you, terribly.

Good Freakin’ Byes

Kung nanunuod ka ng series na One Tree Hill at kilala mo ang isa sa mga bida dun na si Peyton Sawyer, alam mo ang sikat na linya nyang “People always leave.” Bakit niya kaya nasabi yun? Saang malalim na balon naman kaya niya hinugot ito?

Here’s an idea. Karamihan sa mga tao sa buhay natin sadyang “passers-by” lang at hindi pang-matagalan. Ok, fine. Pero diba mas magiging simple kung di mo na lang sila nakilala at nakasama nang sa gayon di ka masasaktan at mangungulila pag iniwan ka na nila?

Pero siguro ganun talaga. Naniniwala ako na lahat ng taong nakakadaupang-palad natin ay may kanya-kanyang istorya sa buhay natin. Meron diyang magiging inspirasyon mo, merong magbabago ng pananaw mo sa buhay, meron din namang magtuturo sayo ng mga bagay na hindi mo alam, merong magmamahal sayo, merong magiging kaibigan mo, meron diyang makakasama mo sa kalokohan, merong tutulong sayo at meron ding magsisilbing mga warning sa buhay mo.

Eto ang pinakadahilan kung bakit hindi dapat tayo magalit o magtanim ng sama ng loob sa mga taong nang-iwan sa atin. Merong dahilan kung bakit sila umalis, merong rason kung bakit di sila maaaring magtagal. Hindi ibig sabihin na nawala sila eh ayaw na nila sayo, marahil nagawa na nila ang kanilang layunin sa buhay mo at kung magtatagal pa sila eh lalo ka lang masasaktan o mapapahamak kaya’t kinailangan nilang iwan ka. Kaya chill lang, wag mong personalin.

Natural, tao lang tayo kaya mas madalas kesa sa hindi, mahirap intindihin dahil nasanay na tayong andyan sila at masakit isipin na sa susunod na umagang paggising mo, alam mong nawalan ka. Wala kang magagawa para pilitin silang bumalik, ganun din naman nung nagsumiksik sila sa buhay mo diba? Wala kang choice, sa ganun eh.

Dapat rin nating isipin na sa buhay ng iba, naging at magiging “passers-by” lang din tayo. Meron ding mga taong kinailangan at kailangan nating iwan dahil tapos na ang istorya natin sa buhay nila. Meron tayong mga nasaktan at masasaktan kahit hindi natin sinasadya. Uulitin ko, wala kang choice, sa ganun eh. So quits lang diba?

Pero wag kang mawalan ng pag-asa, hindi naman ibig sabihin nito eh lahat ng kwento sa buhay mo ay may malungkot na katapusan. Meron ding happy ending, yan ang sigurado ko. Meron ka ding sariling version ng “…and they lived happily ever after”. Imulat mo lang ang mga mata mo, baka andyan lang pala siya sa harap mo, hinihintay kang tumingin.

In the Eyes of a Stranger

Earlier today, I was standing in front of the mirror and I found myself looking into the eyes of someone I am not familiar with. I am not being senseless in any way, this is just what I honestly felt at that exact moment.

I’m thinking why suddenly, I am no longer that person I knew I was, I am no longer that person people around me got used to, I am no longer BING, so to speak.

Don’t get me wrong. This might not be negative at all. It may even be for the better, I am just not sure. Moreover, I’m not all saying that I have changed. All I know is that I am now different, different from who I used to be.

Last Monday, I had a long, nice talk with a very close friend of mine. She thought that, in this phase I am currently going through, there is a lesson learned, or better put, a realization. Naturally, I got curious and asked. She bluntly told me that I am actually capable of loving selflessly. All along we both have agreed and believed that all my past relationships failed due to my self-centered demeanor. I have made mistakes that are more or less because only what I want mattered. Isn’t karma a real b*tch? Ironic, it is. Ahhh, the Yoda in me.

Alright, back to business. Once, I came across this quote, “Love creates the best version of you.” And this might be it, this might really be the answer. For now, I choose to think that it is love, only because I don’t have anything else logical.

In the mirror, I am seeing someone created by love. I no longer see that person who is so afraid of getting hurt that she can’t give herself completely to someone. I no longer see that person who is coward enough to keep herself from truly falling in love. I understand that this makes me vulnerable to pain. Trust me, I know. But I don’t care anymore.

For I am no longer my own person, somebody else owns me now.

Something about Life

Good morning, sweet people! T.G.I.F isn’t it?

I just came across this quote and want to share it with y’all.

“Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Forget about the ones who don’t. Believe things happen for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.” – UNKNOWN

Indeed! Couldn’t agree more.

Changes

For the past 3 weeks, everything has been a whirlwind. There are so many changes happening in my life that it is already overwhelming. I am unable to keep up. New job, new industry, new work shift, new place, new friends – new everything. They say, changes are inevitable, alright point taken. But, isn’t the world much simpler without them?

Honestly, I am afraid of changes. I fear going out of my comfort zone to experience new things. I feel that changes trigger mistakes which in turn develop into failures. Who wants to fail anyway? No one. Because we are living in a world of expectations where failing is never an option. No, that is just pushing things way too far – me and my pointless thinking. But not anymore.

Let me share the best advice I’ve got so far. “Life is full of changes. The only time they stop is when you die. So just relax, never be afraid to commit a mistake. That is part of being human and who knows, it might not be a mistake after all. Live life – one day at a time, one step at a time, one breath at a time.”

Now, how do I deal with change? I say, bring it on like donkey kong!

Every Year Weirdness

CAUTION: THIS IS MERELY AN OUTPUT OF SHEER BOREDOM.

Today is September 18th, Sunday. It’s 7:30 PM and I’m sitting in a bus bound to Manila. On the television is some tagalized kung fu movie which, I’m sure, doesn’t entertain the passengers, not at all. So, I decided to bring out my ipod and just listen to my newly downloaded mp3s. After a few songs and some “MTV” moments looking through the wet glass pane stained by the rain pouring hard outside, I eventually got bored. And if I’m bored, I either read or write. I am not bringing any book so here goes nothing.

Hmmm. See, 10 days from now, it’ll be my birthday (yeah, again). I am turning 26 years old on the 28th. But why do I feel as if I haven’t really grown old? Yes, my age increments but essentially, I am still the same person I was 10 years ago.

I may have changed physically, not vertically perhaps but horizontally, hell yeah. But everything else is the same. The things that I want, things that I dream of, things that I hate, things that I do, things that I wear, my plans, my perspective in life, my interests, the way I see things – they are all just about the same. Is this what they call midlife crisis? If so, I completely have no idea.

People always say, “a year older, a year wiser”. Hah! I beg to disagree. I still do the same mistakes I’ve done in the past, maybe even worse. I guess this does not apply, not to me at least.

I just hope that this annoying feeling would soon go away. I wish that someday when I wake up on September 28th, I won’t be feeling this yearly weirdness again.

So, who’s with me?

B.U.M.

Heyah!

It’s 1:30 AM and I am still up. So good evening, or should I say good morning? There, whatever works for you.

It is officially my 3rd day out of work and it is slowly killing me. The boredom, the boredom and uh, yeah, the boredom. In our daily lives, we sometimes wish that we have nothing to do but I think this is too much for wishful thinking. Or perhaps, it is just me. I just can’t stand lying around and doing nothing. Maybe, I am designed to work. Ammmm no, I guess not too.

And when I have nothing to do, I write, or for lack of a better term, doodle. Yeah, that is it, doodle. So, I’m working on something. Something that is not so important, something that you can find elsewhere packaged and presented in a much better way. Hahaha! Of course, it’ll be posted here soon. You have no choice.

Cheers and goodnight!